I wish I could figure out exactly what we’re supposed to do about CHURCH. We have toyed with the idea of moving to Trinity Evangelical Free Church, but so far we’re still committed at Heritage Park Baptist. I suppose I could list reasons to move and reasons that I’m reluctant to do so.
Reasons to move:
1. I think the people at TEFC are generally more supportive of the things I have come to believe are important, such as large families, homeschooling, parental authority and influence, young people becoming adults instead of adolescents, courtship or mature dating, and family worship. I could talk about these concepts without being considered odd or seeming to be judgemental or critical of other people’s choices in these areas.
2. I like the idea of my younger children being under the influence of the adults that I know at Trinity, such as David and Susan, Tamara and Van, Steve and Martha, etc. I also would like to encourage their friendsuips with other homeschooling, conservative, courtship-minded families and their children.
3. I enjoy the worship time at TEFC, probably because I’m tired of the service at HPBC.
4. I have a great deal of respect for the leadership at TEFC and the things I have heard about the way they do things in that church family. I like what Martha told me about Krystal’s baptism and about the way some other situations and problems in the church were handled.
5. I am struck often by the superficiality of much of the teaching at HPBC. I still don’t understand why Tony was asked not to finish the series of lessons thaat he had planned on people’s response to September 11th. I can’t believe some of the things that my children tell me that they hear in Sunday School. (One child’s teacher congratulated them on being almost 17 so that they could go to R rated movies. Another teacher told them that Catholics aren’t Christians. Several children tell me that they don’t learn anything at church. Many of the people at HPBC are committed to Christ, but the material taught especially to the children is very light and fluffy.)
6. Heidi doesn’t want to go to HPBC anymore for some reason. (Of course, she doesn’t want to go to TEFC either. She wants to go to church with her friends from dance.) Emily would like to move to TEFC, and next August would be a good time just before she moves into the youth group. Miriam, Isaac, and Bethany all have friends there. Our children would also enjoy AWANAS at TEFC.
Reasons to stay:
1. We have to stay until at least August 2004 because we are committed to teach fifth graders in Sunday School
2. I am concerned about Heidi’s lack of commitment to our church and her possibly frivolous reasons for wanting to go to Haley’s church. I am afraid that by leaving HPBC we may unintentionally reinforce the idea that you choose a church family like you choose a place to shop or a club to join. You find out where you feel comfortable and where your favorite people are, and then you go there. If you get tired of one church or mad at the preacher or unhappy with this program or that, you go somewhere else. I believe that the reasons for choosing a church or for changing churches have to be much more significant than those, and I don’t know if the Lord is truly telling us to move or if we’re just feeling restless.
3. Christopher absolutely refuses to consider leaving HPBC. He says that the only place he has any friends is HPBC, and I think he is learning something from Jason’s teaching.
4. We’ve been at HPBC for almost twenty years. We have a relationship with that church family that will be impossible to re-create. These people have seen all our children born, seen us through tragedy, celebrated with us. It’s almost like breaking up a family.
5. The preaching is theologically sound and Baptist. I really think I believe what Baptist believe—even if I might like the worship style somewhere else (not going to TEFC for the high church worship style either.) I don’t know if I believe what the evangelical free church believes even though I’ve checked it out some and it seems to be very baptistic. I also like Southern Baptist traditions and concepts: the emphasis on missions, the cooperative program, Lottie Moon, Bible drill (which we’re not doing anyway), etc.
6. The grass always looks greener on the other side, but what happens a few years down the road if the pastor of TEFC moves and the make-up of the church changes, and the people we went there to be close to move away or leave? Is God leading us to a new churchfor better or for worse? Or will we be church hopping again in a few years?
7. Maybe we’re supposed to be at HPBC for a reason. I don’t really feel like I have much influence over anyone in that church, but maybe I don’t know. I would like to think that our being there could influence someone to try homeschooling or to pray about the number of children that God wants them to have or to “kiss dating good-bye” or just to think more deeply about their faith and what it means to live Christianly in this society. However, I’m afraid that our being at HPBC may have the opposite effect of causing our children to abandon these concepts before they’ve even tried them. If your Bible study teachers at church hardly ever require you to think and if the Christians you see all the time at church don’t see any problem with public schooling or with birth control or with serial dating, then why would our children think these things are worth being concerned about.
SO..o..o..o, I don’t have it figured out, and I wish someone would help me. Maybe my husband has some ideas about these things???